Care Bears Night

After another amazing episode last week with Ozzfest Night, it was time for Care Bears Night! Okay, I am just going to say this right now, I have no idea why this was a theme night. Usually, I am able to understand why there is a theme night centered around a pop culture franchise, but in this case, I could not figure out why. The Care Bears have not been relevant in decades, I’m not even sure if some people even remember who they are, and some of you reading might not remember who they are either. I also had no idea what songs could possibly have been performed on this episode. Granted, there were some theme nights this season where I had no idea what songs could have been performed, but after finally seeing them, I was sort of able to understand why some of the songs were chosen, but even as we got closer to this episode, I couldn’t think of any songs that could be performed, as at best, all I could think of was that they would pick random songs on this episode, and then reverse engineer them with some mental gymnastics to connect them to The Care Bears. And it turns out, I was right. 

The episode started off the same way as many of the other episodes have recently: with a group performance of Walking On Sunshine by Katrina & The Waves from all the contestants in the episode. As I have said so many other times before this, I enjoy these group performances, as they give all the contestants a chance to stand out together, and they always pick the best songs for it.

I would also like to add that there were four people on this episode that were dressed in live size Care Bears costumes. This will probably become important later on.

From there, it was time for the first performer of the night, which was Pangolin. In lieu of clue packages for this episode, each contestant instead gave a colossal clue to their identity. In the case of Pangolin, she proved that Jenny’s guess of Christina Perri was wrong, as Christina Perri herself made a special appearance to say that while she wasn’t a contestant, both she and Pangolin love a girl’s night out together, and she couldn’t wait for the next one.

She then went on to give a great performance of What A Feeling (Flashdance) by Irene Cara, during which she showed off all the power and energy in her voice.

After the performance, she said that the girls’ nights with Christina Perri have been some of the most meaningful and fun of her whole career.

I still agree with the popular guess on the internet, which is that Pangolin is Rachel Platten, as she was part of the Girls Night Out Tour with Christina Perri in 2015.

The next performer of the night was High Voltage. As part of his colossal clue, he said that the biggest clue to his identity was right in front of the panelists the whole time, and then an additional part of his colossal clue was a cowboy on a horse. By the way, as soon as High Voltage said the biggest clue was right in front of them, I knew that if they didn’t get it now, they were never going to get it.

He then went on to give a great performance of Bad Day by Daniel Powter, during which he showed off his range even more, and showed off the emotion in his voice.

After the performance, the panelists made their guesses, and Rita admitted that she was not familiar with American football, and the only other thing she could think of, which she admitted was crazy, because of the song Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy, was one of the members of Big & Rich, eventually settling on John Rich because of the cowboy hat. When Rita said that she knew her guess was crazy, this was not what I thought she was going to say, but I will get to that later.

The next performer of the night was Pugcasso. For his colossal clue, he said that The Masked Singer wasn’t his first competition, and that he has even taken the Olympics by storm.

He then went on to give a great performance of Dreams by The Cranberries, during which he showed off all the emotion in his voice. 

I still agree with the popular guess on the internet, which is that Pugcasso is Phillip Phillips, as he won American Idol, and his song Home was the unofficial anthem of the 2012 Olympics.

The final performer of the night was Crane. The bird, by the way, not the construction vehicle. For her colossal clue, a man dressed as a football player was on the stage and proposing. 

She then went on to give a great performance of Good Luck, Babe by Chappell Roan, during which she showed off all the power and energy in her voice.

I still agree with the popular guess on the internet, which is also what Rita and Jenny guessed, which is that Crane is Normani, as she is currently engaged to football player DK Metcalf.

After that, it was time for Nick to announce the first two singers advancing to the Semi Finals, which were revealed to be Crane and Pugcasso, which did not surprise me.

This meant that High Voltage and Pangolin would now be competing in the Care Bears Royale. They both took turns singing I’m So Excited by The Pointer Sisters, and while I think they are both great singers, I felt that Pangolin did better here, which is an opinion that my mom and my uncle also shared.

After that, it was time for Nick to announce who won the Care Bears Royale and would be moving on to the Semi Finals, and it was revealed to be Pangolin, which did not surprise me.

This meant that it was time for High Voltage to unmask. Before I get into his unmasking, I’m going to let you all know something. I knew from the trailer that he said the biggest clue was right in front of the panelists, and I also knew that they were going to realize at some point that his head was a soccer ball. There is a reason why I am saying this now. 

Before he was unmasked, The Crack The Case Clue Case for him was brought out, and inside was revealed to be a pair of cleats. From there, the panelists made their final guesses, thinking that the clue in front of them was the number 22, which resulted in them making terrible guesses like Tom Brady, Julian Edelman, and Travis Kelce, while Rita admitted that she knows nothing about football, so she decided to connect the cleats to soccer, at which point she thought of Ted Lasso and guessed Jason Sudeikis, which is also what I thought her guess was going to be earlier in the episode.

And from there, things just got progressively more crazy.

After all the panelists had made their final guesses, Who Are You by The Who started to kick in like it does with all the other unmaskings… at which point Jenny finally realized that the head on High Voltage was a soccer ball, which caused the music to abruptly cut out, to which Nick told them that they could not change their guesses, and Rita also declared at that moment that she was not a moron. The music then kicked back in, and it was time for the unmasking to continue… at which point the person dressed as Cheer Bear came “running” out to the stage and immediately face planted, which caused the music to cut out AGAIN, until they got up as if nothing had happened, and the music resumed from where it left off, and the internet was proven to be right yet again, as High Voltage was revealed to be former soccer player turned sportscaster and singer Alexi Lalas. He also got some funny moments towards the panelists as well, calling them out for never getting the soccer ball that was right in front of their faces and on his head, and then sarcastically apologizing that he was not Tom Brady.

Overall, this was another great episode of Season 14 of The Masked Singer, and I’ll see you all next week with Star Trek Night!